I was sure St. John Rivers—pure-lived, conscientious, zealous as he was—had not yet found that peace of God which passeth all understanding: he had no more found it, I thought, than had I with my concealed and racking regrets for my broken idol and lost elysium—regrets to which I have latterly avoided referring, but which possessed me and tyrannised over me ruthlessly.
Chapter 30 · Narrator
Context
After hearing St. John preach, Jane reflects that his sermon revealed inner turmoil rather than peace, and she draws a parallel between his unrest and her own suppressed grief over Rochester.
Analysis
The sentence's syntax enacts the very concealment Jane describes: she buries her confession about Rochester in a subordinate clause ('than had I with my concealed and racking regrets'), delaying it so long that it feels like an admission forced out against her will. The violent metaphors—'possessed,' 'tyrannised,' 'ruthlessly'—treat her own feelings as external persecutors, showing that Jane experiences her love for Rochester as an invasion rather than a choice. The parallel structure ('he had not yet found... he had no more found it... than had I') binds her suffering to St. John's, suggesting they are both driven by hungers that conventional piety cannot satisfy.
Essay Tip
Support a thesis that Jane and St. John are mirror images of thwarted passion—both are trying to live by principle while inner desires 'tyrannise' them, but Jane's self-awareness here makes her more reliable than St. John, who never admits his own unrest.